By Fire

…but it’s a good burning.  We knew it was coming, and last Friday we final did it.  We went through the great tribulation, talked of only in whispers and through gritted teeth for months.  Yes that’s right, Fernando and I finally took our Italian proficiency test! 

Though this moment is by no means the end of our study of the language, there comes with it a feeling of completion (at least we hope).  According to European international law (Bologna Accord or something) if someone gets a degree studying in a language, one should actually know that language (bizarre huh), and so all the seminarians studying at the Gregorian University where they teach in Italian, which of course include Fernando and me, have to show their proficiency in Italian.  So this past Friday was a big moment for us; it was time for these two months of Italian studies to pay off.  The test was in two parts, a written that focus on grammar and comprehension (it had so audio questions as well), and an oral portion to see how well we can converse. 

It seems like a simple testing process, right?  Well, I think it would have been, if not for the huge number of seminarians lined up for the test.  As it worked out, some of us waited almost two hours (read two hours of worrying) between the two parts for one of the examiners to open up.  Either way, I think we both did well; though, we haven’t received any results yet.  I definitely have room for improvement (the oral part didn’t go quite the way I had anticipated) and even if I don’t past there is another chance later in the semester (which doesn’t prevent me from starting the classes anyway) which will just provide a challenge to get even better control over the language.

Ultimately, this marks the end our formal courses in Italian and indicates that we are drawing ever close to finally starting our theology courses. My class had more formation conferences this week, covering more on priestly identity and celibacy, while a couple of classes, including Fernando with the first year men, were on retreat. The other class that was on retreat are the forth year men.  In their last year of formation, these men are preparing to be ordained deacons.  In fact, that is what the entire next week is dedicated to, deacon ordinations.  This ordinations week is our last hurrah before classes begin the following Monday, culminating in the actual ordination Thursday morning in St. Peter’s Basilica.

Entering this final week before classes makes me realize that seminaries all over the U.S. have already started.  This, of course, includes our Phoenix seminarian brothers.  They have been studying hard and giving themselves over to the formation of their respective seminaries, St. John Vianney in Denver and the Pontifical College Josephinum in Columbus, OH,  for over a month already.  One of the difficult elements of studying in Rome is being away from the fraternity of our diocesan brothers (db’s for short).  They are a lot of fun and holy men studying for the diocese of Phoenix and I am blessed to be a part of this group, who have been so supportive to Fernando and me during this transition with their prayers and who we make sure we pray for daily.  Plus, we are thrilled to have 9 new seminarians this year.  The diocese website has some an excellent page dedicated to the seminarians with short bios for each one.  Check it out and please pray for all of the men in their discernment and their studies.  

Seek His Face

Last week I went with all of the Second year class on a week long retreat.  It was a wonderful and needed time.  We headed off on Sunday afternoon for Rocca di Papa, a small town up on a hill about an hour outside of Rome.  It was a pretty little town with a breath taking view of the city and the surrounding area.  We stayed at great retreat center ran by the Sister of the Sacred Heart, who made some of the best food I’ve had so far in Italy.

The retreat was silent, and it was a beautiful silence.  Now that doesn't me there was no sound, we had mass everyday together, as well as Morning and Evening Prayer, and even a holy hour, but all the time in between was reserved for talking with God alone, including meals.  It definitely can have it challenges. Especially, when you have a good friend sitting across the table from you at dinner, the slightest look seems to send everyone into a laughing fit.  But it was wonderful just be able to share that time of prayer with my classmate without having to say anything.

For me personally, this time of prayer was something I had needed for a while.  It seems Fernando and I have gone non-spot since we arrived in July, and though we have had a chance for breaks and breathers throughout, it can be hard to absorb everything that’s happened.  This week was a time for me to sift through these experiences and all the emotions that come along with them and thank God for all the graces he has given me in them.  The amazing grounds of the retreat center provided a natural place to do that.

It is almost startling that even when in the seminary, trying to follow God’s will and studying about Him and how best to serve His people, it is so easy to get distracted, to get carried away with the little things of the world.  As a result, the waves of obligations, projects, and meeting feel like they are overwhelming us, threatening to drown out the joy of our life (yes, even in Rome).  Finding the silence at these times, finding Christ waiting to reveal His heart to us is of supreme importance.  In failure and success, the to-do list may rage and foam, but Jesus’ love is ever present and the world can calmly continue in joy. 

Just about every night of the retreat there was an absolutely gorgeous sunset.  It became a regular meeting place for the whole class to watch God unfold His gifts for us in silence.  They were beautiful moments of fraternity, and no one had to say anything.  Enjoy.

Quick afterthought:  Way to to D-backs!

...and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life

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16 September 2011
Feast of St. Cornelius and Cyprian, martyrs

Tuesday I finally registered with the university where I will study theology, the Pontifical Gregorian University.  Though classes start only a month from now, registration is on time.  I don’t know exactly how this works considering that it is unheard of for someone to apply to a private university only a month before classes start. Maybe the seminary reserves us a spot at the university ahead of time and since the seminary has a good relationship with the university (meaning they are the largest single source of enrollment) the school works it out.

The university Kevin and I will be attending come Oct. 10th

Anyways, this week the universal Church celebrated the feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross, Our Lady of Sorrows and, today, the feast of the martyrs Saints Cornelius and Cyprian.  These three back to back feasts are pretty awesome.

The cross is certainly the reoccurring theme.  But what is up with the cross?  Why do (should) Christians love the cross so much?

Well, for us Christians the cross truly is the crux of our lives.  It is where Jesus paid the infinite price for our redemption by His passion and death.  It is where Christ consummated His total gift of self.  It is from where He flooded the earth with the water and blood of His cleansing and sanctifying mercy.  And yet these are only simple terms to speak of the great mystery of God’s love which is beyond human words.

So what does this really mean for us practically?  Well, the truth is I couldn’t tell you, because I don’t know.  It is a gift that we’ve received that’s too big for us to exhaust everything it has to offer. 

That said, one principal key to this mystery is abandonment.  Jesus began his passion by abandoning Himself to the Father’s will; "not my will but yours be done" (Lk 22.42). This is what the cross means to me on a practical level: surrendering to God’s will, therefore freely and joyfully accepting everything, including all suffering and all difficulty.

Everyday, I need to choose to give myself totally to God.  I try to make the conscious effort to surrender my heart to His will, trusting even when His will is unclear or when He silent.  Yet, I would be lying if I said I don’t fall short of this goal everyday.  This is because no person can accomplish true surrender if he holds on to pride or despair.  That’s really easier said than done, since these sins sneak into our lives in quiet ways that are often hard to detect.

At Jesus’ side, Mary abandoned herself to God’s will, accepting the suffering of her son as the will of the Father.  Likewise, Ss. Cornelius and Cyprian abandoned themselves even in suffering, knowing that they were suffering with Christ and that their abandonment to God would gain them eternal life. 

Outdoor entrance to our main chapel consecrated to the Mary's Immaculate Conception

We must not be afraid to give Him our whole selves in following His will (in other words, our calling or vocation).  He is always with us.  He is our refuge.  He is our strength.  He is the God that takes delight in us.

A well known prayer of abandonment

Turn, Turn, Turn...

We are now settling into life in Rome and, after almost two months in Italy, it is finally starting to feel like we are in seminary again. Seminary is, of course, more than just beautiful campus that we have, or just a group of seminarians together. The time we had studying in Assisi was wonderful, especially to share it with thirty of our brother seminarians, but there is something more about being back at the seminary and entering into seminary life, entering into formation.

Formation is one of those catch words in seminary that is used to describe the whole process of becoming a priest. But it is much more than simply things we have to learn before being ordained, nor is it a set number of hours of pray we have to clock. Formation is all the ways that we convert to, turn anew to, the life of Christ and conform ourselves evermore to the Gospel.

This past week, the men of the second theology class returned and I, because I already had a wonderful year of theology at Saint Meinrad Seminary in Indiana, have joined them as we start daily formation conferences. Though this means that I no longer can attend the Italian classes with Fernando, it is refreshing to find myself again focused on the pursuit of the priesthood and less worried about orientation to a new place. And it is this theme of conversion, turning anew to Christ – formation – that has run through this week of talks. It’s a timely reminder at a time when I am worried about orienting myself exteriorly to a new room, new school, and new country, it’s important for me to reorient my heart to Christ and His burning love.

When people ask what we do at seminary it is usually easier to just talk about what classes we are taking and our academic progress, yet there is so much more to this idea of formation. The Church, in her wisdom, has outlined four areas of formation on which seminary focus: Human, Intellectual, Spiritual, and Pastoral.

Human Formation is the foundation of the other four; it deals with having a healthy life style.This includes, of course physical health, exercise and good eating habits, mental heath, a healthy social life and healthy relationships. But it also deals with good manners and social skills, common courtesy and much more. A lot of it happens naturally while just living in community; but areas where everyone can always be growing often get special conferences and we deal with explicitly. The idea is that our personalities and the way we live should always be a bridge leading to Christ and never an obstacle. By way for human formation, all the seminarians here celebrated Labor Day this past Monday (though obviously it doesn’t exist in Italy) with a softball game! It was a lot of fun and all the seminarians either played or came out to watch and enjoy some hamburgers off the grill. It was a wonderful way to celebrate American culture and grow in fraternity. (The picture isn’t the actual game; I was playing at the time, but here is a pick up game later in the week.)

Intellectual Formation is just what it sounds like, it’s the academic course we take and the growth in personal interest in continuing to learn and study. Christ is the Way, the Truth, and the Life, and so we should always strive to grow ever more familiar with the Truth. The seminarians here in Rome don’t actually take our course at the NAC (it focuses on the other areas of formation) but go out to a variety of different universities in Rome. The primary universities used by American seminarians are the Gregorian, the

Angelicum, and Sante Croce. Fernando and I will go to the Gregorian and we will hopefully be able to tell you more about it once classes start there.

Spiritual Formation is the piece that binds all other areas together. It is our growing in relationship with the Lord and allowing that relationship to permeate everything we do. So we pray daily as a community, Morning and Evening prayer, Mass, holy hour, and often a rosary. Also we have at least an annual retreat (I start mine this coming week!) and a number of spiritual conferences on different topic about the spiritual life.

Pastoral Formation, then, is the culmination of all the formation. Practically it includes learning the functions of how to say Mass and hear confession, preaching and council, reaching out to the poor and the estranged, but it is also concerned with fostering an identity of a priest and a life dedicated to the people of God. For Fernando and I, and all the Phoenix seminarians, our goal is to grow in all areas of formation, to be formed by the Father’s guiding hands, to become priests worthy to serve the people of Phoenix. We are constantly looking towards returning to be an image of Christ, the Son, and bring Phoenix the joy that we have found in Him.

Please continue to pray for us Phoenix seminarians and all seminarians as we try to faithfully follow God’s will in formation.

Upon this Rock

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He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” Simon Peter said in reply, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”  

Jesus poses this big question concerning His identity to Peter. One can almost hear the intensity and awe with which Peter cries out these words. But Jesus affirms that it is by God’s grace that he knows Christ’s true identity, not his own human wisdom.

Jesus said to him in reply, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah. For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my heavenly Father.”

What a beautiful event! God used Peter, a simple fisherman, to utter so eloquently this fundamental truth of the identity of Christ. What follows in this passage from the 16^th chapter of Matthew’s gospel is all the more astounding:

“And so I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church, and the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it. I will give you the keys to the kingdom of heaven. Whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.”

This week, Kevin and I along with the other 74 men from our class had the privilege of seeing Pope Benedict XVI at a short distance for the Angelus Address he gave this past Sunday at Castel Gandolfo (the town in which the pope’s summer residence has been for hundreds of years). It was incredible to be so close to Pope Benedict, our spiritual father and teacher.


At the end of his address, after recognizing (in their own languages) several groups that had come to see him from all over the world, he welcomed us! He gave us special words of encouragement that I will cherish forever. He said “I also greet the new students of the Pontifical North American College. Dear Seminarians, do not be afraid to take up the challenge in today’s Gospel to give your lives completely to Christ. Indeed, may all of us be generous in our commitment to him, carrying our cross with faith and courage. May God bless all of you!” 

 (Click here from more pictures)

As if that wasn’t enough excitement for a while, we had a private tour of the papal gardens given by Archbishop James Harvey, the Prefect of the Papal Household (which means he is one of the pope’s principal service men).

Later in the week, we got to go on a Scavi tour, which was an amazing way to follow up our visit with the pope. The Scavi tour is of 1^st and 2^nd century ruins underneath the Basilica of St. Peter which culminates with the tomb of St. Peter and a viewing of the actual bones of St. Peter!!

After these incredible experiences, I find myself in silence, once again in awe that God reveals Himself to us and guides us using such simple means. Peter, a man, human, whose body has worn away like our own will, has been a vessel through which God continues to lead us. It is not because Peter was worthy, it is not because Pope Benedict XVI is worthy, and it is not because we are worthy. In comparison to God, we are all bone and dust. Yet everyone is called by God, in a personal way, to know, love and serve Him. May we do so faithfully until death.

 

On minute 10:30 is when BXVI addresses the seminarians in English.